sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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