The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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