they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
