would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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