I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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