I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
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So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
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You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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