Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I party with great urgency now.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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