He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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