Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
