do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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