sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
how does that bad decision feel?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
