I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
