Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
