I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
someone threw a dead crab at me
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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