Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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