i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
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found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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