you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
