i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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