I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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