This girl is more easily done than said...
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
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