I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
