Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
it's like heaven, but drunker
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
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