Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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