Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I CAN MOONWALK!
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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