Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize