So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
