Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I am mentally ready for anal.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
