OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize