I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Someone shattered a urinal.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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