last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
