Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I love you.
Bad choice
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