The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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