Whats the glycemic index on semen?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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