you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize