I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
