Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
