I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Randomize
