She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Randomize
