Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
