Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
you didnt know i had herpes?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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