so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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