I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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