I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
She is in my trunk
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
