well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
