my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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