He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
