Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
