IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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