You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
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