No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
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I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
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I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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