If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize